What should I do if my girlfriend tells me she is a lesbian?

What should I do if my girlfriend tells me she is a lesbian? (I’m a man.)

Occasionally there is a person who is primarily attracted to women, identifies as a lesbian, and still wants to be a in a relationship with a man. But if your girlfriend doesn’t make it clearer what’s going on, telling you she’s a lesbian probably means she’s also breaking up with you.

It’s reasonable for you to feel bad about getting broken up with and confused about how this changes your understanding of how she felt about you during your relationship, but you shouldn’t blame anyone, not her or yourself. If your girlfriend was just in a relationship with a man and now only feels attracted to women, it’s likely she’s feeling kind of confused. As her friend, you should try to be supportive.

Recommendations: A book about coming out and a book about sex in college.